A man who got pregnant from a one-night Grindr hookup is adjusting to life as a “seahorse dad” after welcoming a 𝑏𝑎𝑏𝑦 baby girl. Ash Patrick Schade, 28, spent two years transitioning before finding out she was pregnant in February 2020.

She had been taking testosterone and estrogen blockers, and thought that would lead to pregnancy. But after hearing the happy news, she immediately stopped the treatments to take and 𝐛𝐢𝐫𝐭𝐡 to her daughter, Ronan Shiʋa, now one. The father-of-one had struggled with his gender identity for as long as he could remember, but was excited to start a family of his own as the father of a seahorse, claiming his pregnancy helped him get through the pandemic.

A seahorse father is a term used to describe a gestational father who is transgender or non-feminine. The term comes from seahorses, of which the males carry and carry their young. The mental health worker and doctoral student from Huntington, West Virginia, USA, now co-parents Ronan with her husband and Jordan, 28, who is a stepfather and full-time stay-at-home mom.

Ash said: “At the time I became pregnant I was taking testosterone gel and estrogen blockers, and it had never occurred to me that I could get pregnant while taking them as it is a very rare occurrence. “I was going through a difficult time between 2019 and 2020 and struggled with my mental health due to my divorce. “I ended up getting on Grindr and accidentally got pregnant.

“It was a huge shock, but I fell in love with my surprise and went ahead with the pregnancy, despite struggling with dysphoria and medical risks. “Ronan is my everything, I love her more than myself.”

Ash found the pregnancy difficult, often encountering a lack of trained medical staff who understood her situation. He said: “No one wanted to take my case when I found out I was pregnant.

“I was a high-risk case, with a high chance of the pregnancy going wrong. “I struggled with pregnancy, especially with the pandemic. “But once I was assigned a doctor, he worked with me to understand how I was feeling and what I was going through.

“When I entered the room, the team of medical staff had already been informed of my situation and they were incredible, until they were swapped with different members of staff later. “Seeing my hairy legs in the stirrups must have caught one of them off guard, as they said ‘you might need to rethink your gender identity.’

“It may sound counterintuitive, but giving 𝐛𝐢𝐫𝐭𝐡 felt like one of the most masculine things I’ve ever done.

“For me, growing up and looking at male role models, being a man was never about having the smallest penis: it was about what you did to help others, what you could achieve and achieve.

“Bringing life into the world as a parent to a seahorse was incredible.”

Despite the medical difficulties of her pregnancy, Ash found solace in the support of her husband and the online LBGTQI+ community. He said: “I felt like I was in the wrong body for as long as I could remember.

“My parents didn’t know anything and thought that conversion therapy was going to cure me, that I was sick. “I hid my feet and identified as a boy at school and became Ash, and wore dark goth clothes as a way to hide how I looked. “Until one day, my mom, who doesn’t want to be named, sent me to school in a pink two-piece suit for picture day and my teacher loudly declared that I was actually a girl named Ashley.

“I went from being popular to a night of no-hate, with my then-girlfriend’s mom calling my mom to ‘keep that gay 𝘤𝘩𝘪𝘭𝘥 slur away from my daughter.’ “I had a really horrible 𝘤𝘩𝘪𝘭𝘥 and a suicide attempt because of the gender dysphoria and trauma I went through.”

Ash feared her mental health would worsen when she discovered the pregnancy. He added: “I worried about how good a father I would be and how others would see me. “But throughout the whole process I had the love of my husband and Jordan supporting me every step of the way, he even cut Ronan’s cord, he has been there every step of the way. “I had all my friends following my journey and checking in, as well as support from the online gay and trans community and even the Satanic Temple of which I am a member.”

Ash is eager to tell Ronan what she was like growing up. He also enjoys educating members of the public when they approach him to ask if Ronan’s mother is in the photo. He said: “I want to be honest and open with Ronan all the time, and explain to him that sometimes trans men can have relationships.

“I can explain to him how I like his mom and dad. “A lot of times people stop us while we’re out and say her mom must look beautiful, or if I’m with Jordan, they’ll ask me where we adopted her. “So it’s usually a pretty interesting conversation to start when I explain everything to them.